Also

I swear to God I'm not that shallow.

I know it seems from my previous posts that I'm only interested in someone for being good looking, but it's far from the truth.

I'll readily admit, being attractive is a huge and crucial part of me liking someone, HOWEVER, it does NOT end there. I love smart men. I love men who share so many interests with me, i.e. music taste, TV taste, faith systems, ideals, and ESPECIALLY sense of humour. If I can make you laugh, and you meet one or more of the criteria up there (depending on which they are), you've probably already got my heart. You gotta be incredibly keen on your joke makin' as well, and also your rhetoric and slang vernacular mixed with ordinary day by day speech. I love a man who can smooth talk.

Hmmmm that's all. Trying to rid my head of this mess I guess.
Early bedtime tonight, then school at 10am, home around 1:30pm, off to the costume store perhaps, then homework all day.
I really want to stay focused on my reading, especially with this stupid 3-4 page essay that's due Thursday. GREAT.

Semester two cannot come faster.
Or, december 16th, at least.

Whatta babe

I can't even get over how good looking you are.

I really wanna hangout...and we have so much in common, and we already seem to hit it off so well... I dunno, maybe I'm the only one in this outfit feeling this way.

But it'd be nice if you pursued.

So nice.

Gosh Dangit

I just want you to talk to me
pwease?

GAHH YOURE TOO ATTRACTIVEE

Confession:

I think you are the cutest thing in the world.

HELP ME

This is the busiest week (and next week as well) of university that I have had to deal with so far.

Ohh gooosh

I have an essay, some FAW work, a SHIT TON of reading, two (easy) midterms next week, a play to see for my critique due in a couple weeks, a scansion analysis due in three weeks, more reading, more random projects I bet, a bio assignment, and the second bio midterm in like three weeks, -_-

I love all old school things.

They make me feel SOOOOOOOOO happy.

I love everything from the 1900-50's and the 80's were jive as hell too. All of the stuff that went on in those eras do something to make my heart soar. It's so wonderful and I really wish I had been alive back then. There is no comparison to the crappy awful world we live in now. I mean there are some awesome aspects of Western culture during the nearly two decades I have been living, and I will treaasure them and appreciate them greatly as I get older, but there is nooooo replacement for the golden ages that my grandparents grew up in. I love elderly folk. They are so kind and benevolent and friendly to everyone, strangers especially, it's like they're still stuck in the 40's and 50's, giving exact change, going out for coffee and buying the newspaper, reading it faithfully, having chats with their old friends for 30+ years, ohh goodness I can't even express how adorable that whole generation is to me. I am going to miss them so much when they die out. They don't make good hearts and hardworking, friendly, right-minded people like that anymore. I am truly sad about this!!!!!! I pray that I end up in a wonderful place where I can raise my family to reflect the days of old and no new-age nonsense corrupting their beautiful minds, and perhaps make way for better days to come. I want to make the elders proud. I respect them so much and I hope that some more people in this world besides me feel the same way, and want to carry on their lifestyle to the foreboding and dreadful future. Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my gosh. Such quality back in the day! How I wish I was born back then! :(

Oh well, reasons for everything.
I love what I love and that I have been given the love for it to begin with. God, You do good things to my heart. Thank You.

Now off to watch a bit more Brer Rabbit/Fox/Bear clips before I go to bed. Tomorrow will consist of running, if it's nice out, reading my big long early british lit reading (The Second Play of the Shepherds), finishing Jersey Shore season 2 and showering. Yayyyy a productive day till the very end! I enjoyed this weekend, minus one part, but mistakes happen to the best of us.

I will grow up and be so proud of myself. My mind is a wonderful place sometimes, because He resides in it, and has given me a lot to love and a lot to learn from. (: (:

Retain and regrow

I am learning many new things these days.

I am holding on to them, and letting go of all that has deterred me from becoming my best.

I am learning who my best person can be and discovering how to finally grow out of all my worst habits that have prevented me from succeeding in a number of aspects in life.

It is very refreshing and exciting.

And some other weird things are happening that I'm not sure what to think about. I don't know what title to give them or what category to place them in, but it is a difference in the world I live in that I am happy to have.


My heart jumps around a little as I reflect on all of this.

I have been turning to greatly important things now, as a lot of crappy factors have been bringing me down lately. The prioritizing shift has had immensely positive effects, and I could not be more grateful.

God has not let me down with this hopelessness and feeling like I have been betrayed by all people I have invested so much love and emotion in. My family has come first after Him, and they are like my own saints. I am very blessed to have them upholding me no matter how I feel.

I'm being strengthened.

Though I'm confused as to why I can be so on fire for months, or years at a time, and then the fire can go away. I want it to stay, and I think as I'm reaching the age that most people like me discover who they really are, and what mode of living really makes sense for them, it will become easier for me to stay aflame.

This is very, very, very good.

Woohhhh my life is so much different. Already hanging out with people I FEEL the difference in my walk, energy, and attitude in social settings. It's craziness what a month and a half in a completely new environment (that you were born to thrive in) can do to your mind, heart and soul. It's great.

I'm on my way to a great adventure; I think I've begun it already.

Goodnight, and I will give praises to the One who has harvested these wonderful experiences and people in my life. Let this be the beginning of who I really am, growing to be manifested to my fullest brilliance.

Idiots.

all idiots, looking at the facts and knowledge of life's small, insignificant details and not the big picture. i will not bend and break to succumb to your ideals of living. you don't understand and i doubt you will because you do not listen to those wiser than you. only those who share your ideals and are further 'advanced' in learning about them. you are arrogant and ignorant all at once, while you think you are being the complete opposite. i have no respect for these outlooks on life. learn something about the big picture and what life is really about, and what should be respected and appreciated, and then get back to me.

fools.