i was so alone, and You drew near...

song of the night/source of inspiration: AWI by everett

i just finished reading blue like jazz,
Donald Miller is without a doubt the most brilliant,
funniest,
loveliest, most real, authentic writer i've come across as far as i know right now.
i feel inspired and hopeful for myself and the future character of my heart
and how i know that someday i will be set free to love people freely and accepting everyone for who they are, like Jesus would and does
cause i got it rooted in my heart to be just like Jesus
i'm a long way away yet I've come so far.
it'll be a long,
tiring,
painful journey
but it'll be the most worthwhile thing i could ever do.

also i've realised that for most of my life i've prided myself on being solitary and fine with being alone most of the time, and not needing to be with friends or people all the time.
lately i've been finding this to be completely polar opposite to what i need to be doing, in terms of growing in God, i mean.
in order for me to grow in the Lord and grow as a human being with a living soul and aching heart, i need to surround with people who share my passions and troubles and pains and quirks and love of anything and everything.
i need to bring my spirit into a better spiritual place by feeding off of people who can help me grow far better than what i can try to achieve on my own.

for this reason i write,
because i feel like i don't, or haven't yet met the perfect friends or family i should say (cause as we are followers of Christ, we are brothers and sisters alike)
so i'm gunna pray without ceasing that i will find the best possible Christian friends to be with all the time

companionship.
COMMUNITY.
it's near.
it's coming.
my loving faither will provide!

-sof

what's the prognosis, fertile myrtle?

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAA

"That aint no etch a sketch.
this is one doodle that can't be undid, home skillet!"

i love the convenience store cashier on juno
omg

-sof

these are a few of my favourite things...

well at the moment anyways lol.

anyways
life is going really really good right now
has been for a few months now
God is so amazing..even when it gets rough I turn to him for all the support and love I need to get by...
but here's some stuff that i've been lovin hardcore recently :

-learning
-wisdom
-salvation
-no more fear of death
-writing
-this blog website
-Lonnie Mackley
-velvet elvis
-rob bell
-The Chariot
-love, patience, grace, and learning them all slowly but surely
-weekends
-local shows
-MUSIC FOR LIFE
-reading books again after a year or two of not picking one up
-discovering so much more in the Bible and interpreting different meanings and stories of things
-all my beautiful family members
-all my amazing friends, new and old
-baby pictures
-chicken and ranch (OMG)
-creationism and learning how to pwn evolutionists in any debate!!!
-Dr. Kent Hovind (google video him, seriously... mind blowing man)
-an increase in self confidence : )
-everything I've learned about myself and God within the past few months/near year
-so much hope for the future
-Winter shopping!
-Chicago !!! NEXT MONTH!!! stayin in a pimp hotel with all my favourite cousins!
-buffet breakfasts
-walking for a long time
-cuddling:] even though it hasn't happened in a very long time...
-waiting for the perfect manfriend to step in [;
-greeeeen eyes
-my teeth/smile
-JUNO and how people think I sound and talk just like her
-abstinence
-PUNS! ANY KIND OF PUNS
-water bottles
-finding gum packs in your purse
-high fiving random people you don't know (i'll do this one day)
-guitar and piano
-sweet, beautiful melodies and vocal harmonies
-harmonizing
-jam sessions
-worshipping the most High God
-phone, texting, you know it
-Christmas being so near!
-SLEDDING!
-Christmas movies!!!, cookies, homemade bread, family get togethers,
church plays,
carolling, hope, love, renewing of the mind

I am happy with my life as of right now : )
I hope it lasts!

woo!

-sof

thom freakin' green

is by far the most amazing man of Christ i have ever heard of.
he is absolutely brilliant in every possible level when it comes to reaching out to the hopeless and desolate.
i would LOVE to meet him one day.
he is a blessing to this mess of an earth.

but more than that,
i wanna be just like him.
fearless before men to preach and rebuke and everything God woulda had him do if he was standing right in front of him.

unbelievable.

and to think i still get just a little bit tense when i'm asked what i believe in.

but i'm growing by the day.
watching, hoping, praying.
baby steps.

-sof

political correctivity means everything

my sister is making a paki man wii character.
turns out they have a turban installed in the clothing setting.

-sof

i swear i'm done with meaningless posts.

i'm wearing my underoath shirt

that i bought from the show on halloween
i love it
such an amazing night, too
half of them were in drag.
never forgetting it.

the devil wears prada came on in matching sparta suits
mike screams, "THIS! IS! PRADAAAAAAAAA!"
i nearly lost it.
what a fantastic kick off.
although they blew a fuse halfway through still fly, and didn't bother finishing it when they fixed everything
and i was disappointed with the shortness of their set
but whatevs, still amazing.
even though i almost got crushed to a pulp in the pit.
front row sux, NOT!

yeah anyways that was my 2 week past-recap story of the day
hope you're all impressed

-sof

COLDPLAY FT. JAY-Z?

WHAT IS THIS PROFANITY?

-sof

i have missed

playing the piano so much.
even though i'm HARDLY considered even good.
but, i watched and made notes on a few coldplay tutorials on youtube today,
so i should have fun with that.
youtube is AMAZING.

my sister is playing ping pong on wii and bothering the crap out of me to get off,
i wonder why i put up with her.

-sof

ah, the nostalgia

before me is an old calvin and hobbes comic book i've been reading this afternoon.
it's funny cause i used to read them ALL the time.
i have about.. what, 7 or 8 collective books comprised of pretty much every comic written
it just brings back so many memories
when i was ten years old i used to sit on my bed and read them all through and through,
and howl with laughter...they're seriously so funny!
then, i would go to my desk and sketch the many gruesome faces calvin would make when his mother made him eat brussel sprouts or whatever kind of misinterpreted concoction she made for him for dinner.
then sprouted my old comic series i had running around that time.
i still have it lying around here somewhere.
all of them compiled into one folder.
i was a pretty artsy kid.
and had a lot of time on my hands, no doubt

but the stories were so cute.
calvin's reckless imagination and hobbes' cynical outlook of life (kinda reminds me of the relationship between stewie and brian from family guy, although more appropriate for all ages) was always followed up by me having a riot reading their stories.
whether they were venturing to alaska in their city park or running from the evil babysitter
they found fun in everything
my dad used to love it too
he was the one that got me hooked on comics, calvin and hobbes in general

me and my father share the same sense of humour.
and personality isms.

i don't know where i'm going with this anymore.
but sometimes i wish i hadn't tucked away my artistic skills for perservered ambitions instead.
who knows what i want to be anymore.

my brother is now a full time cartoonist in his own world.
his desk is covered with drawings of robots and tanks killing each other.
he's downloaded like, 5 programs on my computer that deal with basic animation production.
unreal.. i was doing the same thing at his age.
it's like i'm seeing myself at ten years old living on through him. he's ten now too.

nostalgia.
it's something i feel so often.
feels like home.

-sof

throwing caution to the wind

I love Sons of God so much.
they put me in such a mellow, calm, uplifted and thoughtful mood.
which is exactly,
the kind of mood that suits me.

I'm glad I found them.
they're brilliant folks.

-sof

head cold

being woken up every consecutive hour of the night is a pain.
so sparks the desire to write.

lost complete count
of the days where i have asked for change
begged for love
cried out in hopes of learning the meaning of grace
and each time without fail
turn and spit in your face
by refusing to comply to your will on my heart
only to love the others around me, and You
and by being unable to do the foremost request
i trash all others.

jealousy finds its home in my heart
far more often than compassion or joy
anger has its way in my tongue
and my mouth speaks of hate and lies
my soul lies blackened by my ungodliness.

if this was meant to be
if i hadn't listened, if i hadn't learned
i would not be here where i am right now
i would be more of a vagabond and liar than i consider myself today
You've seen past it, You've snatched me out of the road to darkness
i am now journeying towards light
and it has never,
never quite been this bright

ambitions changing with the wind,
only You know where i'm headed
i have given You complete control,
yet sometimes i think i can plan things out myself
prove me wrong
steer me clear of the left path
my life will never be as fruitful without You at the wheel

a light to others.
a shining stand of hope for the lost
maybe someday
i can glow bright enough
to attract them
to me, to You

and the path i walk now
has never been,
no not quite
never been quite as bright

gone are the potholes and rocks.
i walk on solid ground.

the most amazing thing i have ever read

“ Some want to live within the sound of the church or chapel bell;
I want to run a rescue shop within a yard of Hell."
-Sons of God.

this hits home for me.
and maybe it could for you too.
let it sink in.

-sof

a ceremonial announcement

of my first blog evar!
(well, outside of myspace).

I've always loved to write and channel my imagination and thoughts through words, so I'll be producing (hopefully) intriguing pieces of work on here in hopes of someone coming across them and maybe even enjoying what I have to say.

in conclusion,
I HAVE GRATUITOUS AMOUNTS OF ENERGY!
but not quite, I'm actually decently sick and I have watched powerthirst for probably the 6th time today. God bless youtube. 400 BABIES! andddddd I'm done here.

-sof

geez, what's it gonna take to get people to laugh around here...you gotta be witty, vulgar AND good looking... at least the first two can be learned.